gee. I just spent the evening at nathan's house with all of his family. All of them. His uncle, mom, dad, sister, brother, and soon to be sister-in-law. It was just great.

not.

nathan kept on like a little dog asking me what was wrong. nothing is wrong. i feel like shit, and got up a half hour ago.

then he tries to tell me that he'll be over tomorrow.. (sunday) after the baseball game, and i'm like.. uh yeah.. whatever. he goes, what, you don't think I will? I say no. and that is that.

my friend tom's birthday was today, and i was supposed to make it down to kettering/oregon district to celebrate with him, but alas, I did not leave nathan's till 1 am, and I WAS THE FIRST TO LEAVE!!!!! Everyone was still there. (well, his uncle, sister, and dad live there, but his mom and brother were still there). Anyways. Looked at pictures of nathan when he was little and watched some 8 mm screen film. it was interesting.

i love nathan, i just don't think it's enough anymore. what's the friggin' point?

to top it off, i didn't go to bed until 6 am, and then i had to get up at 10 am to be with sydney cause my grandparents were leaving. so i got up, and my chest is seriously hurting, painful and all.

i call a 1 800 nurses number, and they tell me that because i'm having chest pain, i should call 911, no friggin' way am I calling 911 i tell her, i am on three new meds, and i'm having a reaction to one of the meds.

it worsens after i eat.. so i think it's the naproxen... if i stay on this med, i'll be sure to lose weight, negative re-inforcement for eating, get sick, so i'll just quit. :)

so.. i sleep till 430pm, get up and decide to get a move on to get to nathan's by 5pm.

I turn my phone on, and there is a rather disturbing message from my friend sara, at work. i call her at home, and she's not there, but her mom tells me that deb, a lady i work with who i would consider a friend, stroked out of her surgery and is on life-support.

okay, here's the story, deb had an anuresm in her brain, it was there, and they went in to remove it, it wasn't threatening too bad much of anything. she went in for surgery on thursday, and i guess friday night she stroked. and is now on life support. she has a small girl about syd's age, and two teenagers, a boy and a girl.

it was kind of upsetting.. so then i headed to nathan's for the night i just had, when i really would have rather been out with my friends.

oh well. i got to spend time with sydney and watch her play with sparklers.

sydney is still awake, and watching a movie, i'm going to crawl into our bed next to her, and watch it with her. perfect ending to a rather shitty, "whatever", day.

Hearing: Lilo and Stitch Movie
Feeling: misunderstood and miscalculating
Stressing: going to go to bed

past | present

Moving On.... Again! - 12.01.04

2004 Review - 12.28.05

Happy December Everyone - 12.01.04

PS Cunt Teacher - 11.29.04

Fucking Bitch Teacher - 11.29.04